Win32 Conficker Removal Tools

Domain controllers not responsive?

Slow network?

Can't access online security websites such as McAfee and Kaspersky ?

Windows Automatic Updates disabled?

If you have the above symptoms in your computer then you can start to panic now because tomorrow is 1st of April and the Win32 Conficker worm/virus is set to activate on that date. In other word, its ALIVE!!!!

But fret not, the good people from Microsoft and few other anti virus companies have already come up with removal tools. Choose which of the removal tools you prefer, download and run it. If you are unsure, just download all and run all, one by one.

The removal tools listed (Go and download. Its free):

Microsoft Malicious Software Removal Tool 

Win32.Worm.Downadup.Gen Removal Tool (Bitdefender) 

Win32/Conficker.AA Removal Tool (Eset) 

Win32.Downadup Removal Tool (Symantec) 

For more details on the Conficker worm/virus including how to ensure you have a clean system, go to the Microsoft official website regarding the Conficker issue .

Happy Detecting and Removing.

Die Worm

Die.

Evolution

This needs no explanation.

Source: Google Image

Deep Fried Fermented Bean Curd Pork

Or popularly known as the "Nam Lu" pork or is it "Nan Lu" pork? Hmmm, lets just call it Deep Fried Fermented Bean Curd Pork now, shall we? Or you prefer it to be called BenardCometh Special Kickass Awesome Delicious Extraordinary Deep Fried Fermented Bean Curd Pork?

Of course I prefer the second name but somehow I felt that you guys would prefer the first name. I know. I got sixth sense. So, let it be called Deep Fried Fermented Bean Curd Pork alright?

If you have a grudge with pork then you can always use chicken wings. Deep Fried Fermented Bean Curd Chicken Wings very the delicious also. Trust me. I tried it before but I still prefer pork. Ahem.

So, today's post is brought to you by BenardCometh's resident chef, Mr Chef. Yeah, I also thought that the name is very original. Ahem.

First, take a look at what exactly is Deep Fried Fermented Bean Curd Pork. Here, a picture. Just a teaser to get you interested. Yum yum.

Deep Fried Fermented Bean Curd Pork

Anyway, lets get on with how to cook this wonderful and delicious dish. First of all, the ingredients.

The ingredients needed are:

Pork (But of course)

Garlic (Chopped to small pieces)

Chinese Cooking Wine

Corn Flour

Egg 

Fermented Bean Curd

(There is a lot of brands out there)

Light Soy Sauce

Sugar

Oyster Sauce

That is about all the ingredients you needed. You can add some white pepper or black pepper if you want to spice things up a bit.

Maybe you noticed that I don't give ya the amount of ingredients you need. That is because it is up to your instinct how much you want to put in. Trial and error. Trust your instinct. Cuz I trust mine so I did not really measure. Ahem.

Prepare the pork and pour all the ingredients in a big bowl. Mix em well and let em marinade for few hours. Marinade it overnight  in the fridge is the best.

Marinade

Heat up some oil for the deep frying session. Take out the marinaded pork and deep fry em in batches until golden brown.

Deep Fry

After it is golden brown, scoop it up and drain em on a paper towel in a plate. You surely want to do this because I am sure you don't want to eat oily stuff. Rite?

Drain on paper towel

DELICIOUS

That is it. Deep Fried Fermented Bean Curd Pork ready for consumption. You can also sliced em up into pieces or just eat the whole chunk whole like the man you are. Ahem. Or woman. 

Yum Yum

Tasty

There you have it.

Now you know how to make deep fried fermented bean curd pork. 

Good for you.

Happy Trying.

Horny Singaporeans

Alright, I might be flamed by the Singaporeans or Singaporean wannabes for this post but what the heck. Why I say horny Singaporeans?

Well, see for yourself. Got proof some more leh.

Horny-ness

See, I did not make this up. Singaporeans ARE a bunch of horny people if I should say so myself. Ahem.

Then again, there is something I don't understand. If Singaporeans are a bunch of horny people, how come got such news regarding the birthrate not enough to cover the aging population leh?

Quoted:

Singapore's birth rate, at 1.19 births per couple, became the lowest in the history of this ultramodern state. What this means is, should present trends continue, Singapore, incredibly, is shrinking. To be sure, the city-state has no monopoly on baby-deficit disorder syndrome: It's pervasive throughout the region and in other locales.

Source

Apart from the immediate concerns, a longer-term challenge is getting more Singaporean couples to have more babies.

At the Rally, Mr Lee said Singapore's Total Fertility Rate (TFR) of 1.29, which is far short of the replacement level of 2.1, is worrying.

"The problem is acute for Chinese, whose TFR is 1.14, this is below the national average. This means each family is only replacing either the father or mother. The numbers will decline rapidly in a few generations," he said.

Source

Ah, I understand now. My bad for the mistake. Should not call Horny Singaporeans. Should call them, SMART Horny Singaporean. My bad.


Smart because they always use protective gear aka condom aka dom dom which is why the birthrate is low. Make no mistake. Singaporeans fuck make love a lot. That is a fact. Like mad humping bunnies tim.


The very best example is your friend Mr. Gary Ng aka garyng174 . Need I say more meh?


Or wait, maybe its because of people like garyng174 who HOG all the actions and being street smart, of course they always bring condom in their pockets. If not, later not careful got a whole football team how?


Anyway, what is the lesson of this story?


All the actions are in Singapore.


Now, where the heck is my passport. I think I wanna go over lah. Maybe get PR or something.


After all, low birth rate wor. They sure need "talented" foreigners.


Ahem.

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No offense mmmmkay, you Merlions you. Ahem.

Why So Serious???

But hor, we also not too bad...**kiasuism kicks in**. We got Kelvin Ng although he stopped after kena discovered by his wife. Ahem.

Number of the Beast

And that no man might buy or sell, save he that had the mark, or the name of the beast, or the number of his name. Here is wisdom. Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast: for it is the number of a man and his number is Six hundred threescore and six - 666

Revelation 13:18

King James Version

Exactly 24th March 2009 at 9:31:34PM, BenardCometh Revelations has the Mark of the Beast as the Number of the Beast is 666.

Mark of the Beast

Or maybe not since that is one six too many. Ahem...But nevertheless, the mark of the beast. 666 with an additional 66. Ahem.

Beware

Beware

Beware

Gary Ng aka garyng174 Blog

By now you should have known about this so called Gary Ng aka garyng174 for his sexual activities.

Seems like he is very comfortable with his sexuality and no, you will not see him clearly in person in the video since he would probably be caught by the authority if not murdered first by the Singaporeans if he reveal his identity.

Why?

Look at his long list of conquests. Ahem.

SG Mother

SG Daughter

SG Cosmetic Girl

SG Friend's Niece

SG Beer Auntie

SG Pub Waitress

SG Housewife

SG Choa Chu Kang Girl

SG Choa Chu Kang Girl 2

SG Office Girl

SG Downtown East Chalet

SG NUS

SG Cousin

SG Student

SG Banker

SG Bikini Girl

SG Amelia

See, Singapore also very the happening mmmmmkay. Ahem.

See for yourself the videos at his blog titled "Sex is a Natural Part of Life, Love It". Even the title is original. Ahem.

Please be warned that the videos in his blog is definitely Not-Safe-For-Work aka NSFW.

There you have it. Gary Ng aka garyng174 Blog.

Damn Cute Kittens

Straight away thought of xaximie and levian when I saw the videos of the cute kittens. Being the cat lover they are, definitely will be melted with the cuteness.

Awwwwwwwwww

Cuteh

Awwww again

Meow~~~!!!!!

Revelations in Sarawak?

This has got to be the best two videos on Sarawak.

And no, I am not talking about the holiday destination and those leisure places.

This is very much the revelation on Sarawak "open" secret. Ahem.

All Sarawakians definitely have to watch this. Heck everyone have to watch this.

Less with the talk. Watch.

Part 1 - Fight the Power (101 East)

Part 2 - Fight the Power (101 East)

It is just me or it seems that somebody answers "carefully" in the Part 2 of the video.

Ahem.

You decide.

Kelvin Ng aka Gui7Nan

Oh well, this has been quite a hoo haa for quite sometime already. Man go fool around, Man got discovered by wife, Wife screams divorce, Man promised to change and repent.

By kneeling under the sun on a busy and sunny day, expressed his feelings in a video and even blogs about it that goes by the nickname Gui7Nan.

Here you go, the video.

Kelvin Ng aka Gui7Nan

Maybe it's just me but that guy doesn't seems too sincere in the video. Oh well, maybe that IS his sincere face. Ahem.

So guys, don't go fool around alright? If you are married that is. Marriage is a lifetime commitment. A promise of a lifetime.

Unless of course if you are single. Go fool around for all you like. Go make love like mad humping bunnies and no one will care. Just make sure that they are not married or you will also be in deep shit.

Like what is written in the ten commandment.

Thou shall not go and "kau sua" other people husband/wife

Stay Smart.

Stay Safe, mmmmkay.

P/s: "kau sua" means flirting. Sort of.

This is an update. Found the Kneeling at Dataran Petaling Jaya Video. Ahem.

跪妻男 Gui 7 Nan @ Dataran Petaling Jaya, Opposite AmCorp Mall, 7th March 2008 - For more funny videos, click here

Raja Petra Kamarudin

is one of the few people I admire in life. Seriously. There should be a cult by now.

On a second thought, better not because power almost certainly tends to get into the heads of people and make them erm different. He is just fine the way he is now. Malaysia for Malaysian. Ahem.

You should have seen the following videos already and if not, watch it now. Good for you if you watched it live. Ahem.

Well, this may seems outdated already but it is still inspiring. Sort of.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

And you wonder why Malaysia Today is a daily must. Ahem.

Restoring Explorer.exe in Windows

"Help, My taskbar is gone when I start my computer!!!!"


"Why is it that I can see my mouse cursor moving and nothing else when I start my computer???"


"Help, I can only see my documents folder opened when I login into my desktop"

If any of the above sounds familiar to you then this post would do you some good. Honestly.

I received some S.O.S email from some readers that they encountered the above problems and are at loss what to do.

Since BenardCometh Revelations sole purpose is to help all mankind and non-mankind alike, yours truly decided to post a simple step by step on how to recover the missing or non showing explorer.exe.

Before that, a little bit of introduction aye?

The above problem will most probably happen when you are infected with viruses/trojans. Those sneaky bastards sole purpose in life is to make life miserable for anyone they came in contact with. Hence, you encountered a lot of problems and the problem mentioned above is one of the symptoms.

Alright, back to the solution. First of all, you will need to get rid of the viruses/trojans. I will not go into details on how to remove the viruses/trojans because that it not the purpose of this post. Suffice to tell you that the easiest method is to go into safe mode by pressing F8 when you reboot and from safe mode try to use anti virus to scan out the malwares. If that is not successful, then that is another post for another time.

Email me your problems and I will try to see whether I can help or not. My email address is stated at the top left, just below the about me. See, I am a nice guy. Ahem.

Lets assume that you succeed in removing the viruses/trojans and you still get the same problem mentioned. The next step to take when you encountered a blank screen and can only move your mouse or can only see the My Documents folder opened is to press CTRL+ALT DEL.

Press and hold CTRL then ALT then press DEL, you will see the Task Manager pop up.

Task Manager

Then Go to File > New Task(Run...) and the Create New Task window will pop up. Type explorer.exe into the text field area and press OK. Voila, you will have your desktop and taskbar restored.

Create New Task (Run)

Now, you will have to do this every time you login to Windows because the malware sort of tinkered with the registry setting. To make your life miserable remember?

To make the explorer.exe start up automatically like usual, go to Start > Run to go to the execute command window. In Vista, you need to type RUN into the search bar and you will see it.

Run

In the Run window, type regedit into the text field and press OK. Regedit is used to edit the registry. It is the Registry Editor. After you pressed OK, the Registry Editor will pop up.

regedit

Registry Editor

Next, you need to go to HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE > SOFTWARE > Microsoft > Windows NT > Current Version > Win Logon > Shell.

Software

Microsoft

CurrentVersion

Shell

Double click on the Shell string to edit it and the Edit String window will pop up. Make sure the value data is set to explorer.exe, then press OK.

Edit String

Restart your computer and you will see that the desktop and taskbar are displaying properly again. That is it. Simple right?

Hope that helps.

Christian The Lion

Came across this video in Youtube.

It's about Christian The Lion. After being released back into the wild, Christian the Lion's previous owners went to visit him and was told that the lion would not be able to recognize them and that Christian is wild.

But when Christian heard them, the lion runs over and gives them a big lionly hug. Damn, how often you see something like that?

Seeing a lion running towards you would scare the shit out of anyone I would say. Stuff like this only happen once in a blue moon.

Then again, I find it hard to believe but lets there be hope yeah? I want a pet lion like that too. It would be so cool.

Here's the video:

Now kids, lions are dangerous mmmmkay, don't go to your friendly neighborhood Zoo and hug some lions. Don't. Leave that to trained professionals or some very very lucky individuals.

Here's a wikipedia entry about Christian The Lion if you want to know more.

Louis CK

Is also one funny guy.

Is This Gay?

Saddest Handjob In America

Damn hilarious mmmmmkay?

Whatchu Mean No Smoking?

Yeah? 

What'chu mean No Smoking?

How To Clean Crabs

First, choose your crabs, then slaughter the crabs.

And now, you will have to clean the crabs before cooking it for consumption. You don't want to eat dirty crabs now, do you?

Start from the bottom part. Rip off the tummy cover so that it would be easier to crack open the shell and the body.

Bottom

After that, rip open the shell and the body part to separate em. You will see the inner parts and that needs to be cleaned.

Rip open

Separate

Chop the crab into half and start the cleaning process. Use a brush if you have to. Be hygiene mmmmkay...

Chop

Half

Gills

Cleaned

Now, there is just one more thing. You need to tear off the head part of the shell to clean it. Just press on the top and pull.

Press

Pull out

Done

That is basically how crabs are cleaned. Chop the rest of the crabs and clean em. You have the choice to steam the crabs or just put em in the oven.

There is no need for any seasonings if your crabs are fresh. Fresh seafood are best savored fresh and with its original taste.

Cleaned Crabs

Cooked Crabs

That is the end of the crab posts.

Happy Crab-ing.

Ahem.

How to Slaughter Crabs

Alright, this is a post on crabs again.

After you checked the gender of your favorite crabs, you will want to proceed to slaughter aka kill aka take their life away in order to cook em. If not, what for you buy crabs for? For fun is it?

To kill your food first is the humane thing to do mmmmmkay, at the very least give them a fast death instead of just cooking em alive. Oh, you cruel cruel sadistic human you.

So, giving your food or in this case crabs a fast and honorable death is the humane and right thing to do first before proceeding to cook em.

(Remember kids, don't try this at home. If you have crab cravings or fetish, go to your nearest friendly neighborhood restaurant. Ahem.)

Done with the introduction, lets move on with the actual crab slaughter mmmkay?

First of all, identify your victims crabs. For the sake of example, this is Mr. Crab. Say hello to Mr. Crab.

Hello Mr. Crab

Flip over the crab to expose its tummy and you will see the cover-like shell that indicates its a male or female. Open the cover to see the inner tummy.

Tummy

Exposed

Now, get a chopstick or something sharp and proceed to drive it into the middle of the tummy to kill it fast and clean.

Exactly like how you would drive a stake into the heart of a vampire to kill it. Same method. And no, garlic would not kill the crab nor prevent it from pinching you if the pincer is free.

Drive it into the middle of the tummy

A Close Up

Left the crab for a while to make sure it is really dead. It would not be a pretty sight if the crab somehow manage to pinch you with the menacing pincers before it dies because it would be hard to remove em. So be warned.

Life slowly oozing out

Lifeless crab corpses

Now, the crabs are ready to be cleaned and prepared to make a delicious crab dish of which would be shown in the next post.

Cleaning and preparing the crabs are not easy mmmmkay. There is an ancient forbidden technique to do it. So, wait for the next post. Ahem.

Happy Slaughtering.